Happy happy birthday Jesse

Time just runs past us! Jesse is now 2!!!!!!! INSANE!!
We have had a wonderful day so far. And here is some pics from the day!

The birthday cake!

Birthday boy


Trying out his new ride

Jesse now and then

Going to show you pics again of Jesses cleft. My lil book is finished now, and waiting for it to arriwe so i can send it to the team. I also made one for myself! :D
But here we go!

Jesse at birth (before any treatment have started) and Jesse now.

What a cute son we got.... :D and i'll say it once again, LOVE THE RESULTS!!!

Time to put it on paper...

Hard to describe what we have gone threw with Jesse since we found out on the ultra scan that he had a cleft.
All the feelings, all the doctors apointments and operations. I often sit and look at the pictures from his birth and operations. And i still get really emotional, happy, that we have such a lovely son and i cant understand what i was so upset and cyring about... I do but  i don't if that make any sence. We have been treated so well by the cleft team in Stockholm, and WHAT A GREAT JOB they have done... The results are so amazing.
I can never thank them enough. But i do wanna give them something, and also i wanna help (if possible) other parents that might be in the same situation that we were in when we found out.

So i am now making a tiny tiny book. Filled with pictures. Of Jesses life long jurney. I want to show other people that you will give birth to a child with a cleft. Not a cleft with a child (makes so much more sence in swedish). That even if it is hard, and it will be. You will get results you never thought were possible. That life doesn't stop. To be strong and talk about everything that is happening. We are no superheroes and it sure takes on your strength.
I wish i got in contact with a psykologist earlier then i did... But i never wanted to admit to either myself or others that i thought it was hard. The comments you got from people around. And everything wasn't nice... I can remember a few times i got so shocked of comments i made an excuse to go and just broke down in tears.
But i think that the sadest part is the lack of knowledge people have about things like this.
1 child out of 500 is born with a cleft... That is plenty!! AND I AM HAPPY MY SON IS ONE OF THEM! 

Of course everyone wants a child that is perfectly healthy, no disabilyties, nothing...
I wouldn't want to turn back time...

Like mother, like son!!

Jesse also just looooves my monkey, just as i did as a kid. Got it on my first birthday. 27 years ago...

Jesse just loves icecream...

Finally the sumer weather is back... only til friday thou... But better a lil bit then never!!
Today we went in to the city,had some lunch and met up with Therese. And on our way home wegot some icecream.
And someone was ALL HAPPY!!!!!!

Cheeky Jesse

Guessing that Jesse was trying to prove a point or so today...
Maybe that he wasn't finished with his bath when we took him our of it earlier today...
Ha ha ha...

Looking back...

The last few days i'v really notices a big change with Jesse by the way he looks...
The result we got so far, And it's just 10 moths now after the first operation that he had...
Got some pics to update you all of what amazing doctors we've met, that have been able to give Jesse a face that is just beautiful...

Jesse just a few hours old!

The plate

First day with the plate in his mouth

First tejping we did, to lenghten the gap underneth his nose

2nd tejp, to pull the cleft together, and to push back the jaw!

Jesse just about to have surgery.

The day after surgery 090528

Face from front, a few days after surgery

Face from the side... A few days after the surgery

Jesse today, 100410. Not the best pics but i think you get the point... ;)

FINALLY!!!! Jesse is walking!!

Tilt your head and enjoy! :D
Here is super Jesse walking!!

Not able to put it up here but here is the adress...



Yesterday me and the kids went to Stockholm... Jesse had his check up at the hospital after the surgery today. so we went to Stockholm yesterday and stayed at  Jaimees friends place. Jaimee have been going on talking about how much she misses Josefine since the day we moved... So this was a good visit för bothe Jaimee, Josefine and Isabelle! the starting of the trip didn't go so well thou, the train to stockholm was late and as i turned the pram around to go inside to wait for it the f*cking buggybord snapped and broke... so from Linköping til we got to Maria and Peters place i weren't  abel to use it at all!! But Luckely Jaimee was super good and walked all the time without complaining! We stayed there over the night. Kids got super happy to play together, Maria Fixed my nails, and this morning before the hospital Jaimee said hello to her old daycare and we had breakfast at the cafe with Maria, Sarah and Elliot. Even stopped by at another Marias place to leave a birthday present to Jonathan.

The doctors visit went all well and the healing is superbe!!!! In the back of his palet a few stitches had cut loose and opened it up but luckely not all the way threw!!... They think that thouse stitches were the reason why Jesse was bleeding like crazy from his mouth when he fell off Jaimees bed 2 weeks ago!

Jaimee and Jesse have been so good this whole trip to Stockholm and back. Just love it when i am able to do things like this with them without any problems!

Some pics from yesterday and today!

Jaimee and Josefine! BFF

Jesse using Nathalies "disco"

Jaimee bored on the train... soon home thou luckely!!!

Home sweet home!

So long Astrid Lindgrens hospital!! Hello home!!

We were able to come home last night since Jesse is eating a bit better...
And it's going better by the hour now! Nice!

I must say that the hospital stay have been GREAT... but i will more then surely NOT miss anything of this...

And just before we got on the train we met up with Elisabeth and her friend at central!
So much fun to see her again!...

You make me happy when skyes are grey 4.1

Todag is one of thous days that i wish we never got up out of bed... Jesse refuses more or less to eat!
But they have been able to turn down the morfine atleast... Keep your fingers crossed that it will work fine so we can go home tomorrow!

Today Jesse got a visit... a very special one too...
He got a heart shaped baloon and they blew bubbles for him...
And mummy got some "painkillers" too... yammy...

Best surprise ever... 3.2

After beeing super happy about everything i was pushed back in the dirt when Jesse decided to not eat at all!!
And out of nowhere a nurse came in and said that my husband and daughter was here. I didn't know what to say... i was just so happy that i started to cry. But unfortionally they wouldn't let Jaimee in to our room because of the risk to bring in deceses! So we had togo to a waiting room to spend some time...

Now they are stuck in the snow out there!... :( And surely hope they will be able to get home as soon as possible!!!


some pics from their visit!

Good morningsunshine! 3.1

Day three!! And it's a lovely day! Jesse is feeling great! Eating great, (who wouldn't when they give you yoghurt and icecream  for breakfast?!??!!) Strong and allert... Today they took away one of the three painkillers. And they lowered the dose on Morfine aswell... So hopefully we will be going home saturday!
He has been out in the play room crawling, walking, playing and talking like crazy...

Time for me to go and buy some lunch!

Jesse eating yoghurt in bed!

Surgery done and done 2.1

Today was the day... surgery is done...
so close to have it called off even in the operation room, becaus of jesses cough that he got...

They LUCKELY decided to go threw with it... but if jesse would show any signs on having trouble to breath while putting to sleep they would stop and wake him up.

But 5 hours later they called me and said he was done!! *WIIIHOOOOO*

So what did they do??
*The closed the paletcleft. both the soft and the hard bit. The had to open up along the inside of his jaw to be able to sew it together in the middle. and the sides will heal by it self within 2-3 weeks!

*they put tubes inside his ears to drain out the wather so he will get normal hearing!
They even discovered that he had an ear infection so now he needs to eat some antibiotica!

*they cut the "string" underneeth Jesses toung.... was too short before.

And by the time from 13.00 till 19.00 Jesse have ripped out 3 inputs!...
And now we just put a new one in... this time on his hand since his feet are too destroyed to use! :(
+ one of the inputs went wrong and filled up his foot and leg with loads of fluid!

A few pics from today!!

having a good night sleep before surgery

Just got back up to the room...And just pulled out the third input.

Jesses feet all bandaged up from the inputs he have pulled out. HIS right foot got even more bandage and that's because the fluid went in to his body so they put on some cream and some special wool to dry it out!

Hospital 1.1

Tomorrow is surgery day!!!
08,00... so in 8 hours!!

Jesse on the train to stockholm

Me and Jesse on the train

Just arrived to the hospital, waiting for our room to be fixed!

Time to get all clean

Walking around, waiting fot the cream on his feet to make it all nom...

time to fix the input

and big boys dont cry!!!!!

All set and done... Jesse got this teddy from the nurse since he was such a big boy!!!
It was past 10, so WAY past jesses bed time...

Now he is sleeping like a baby!!! And so should I!! They will wake me up in 1 hour to give Jesse his last meal b4 surgery!!!

Talk to you later tomorrow!!! Keep your fingers crossed!!!

Over and out from the hosp.

Operation is on!!!

Jesse got a date now for his next surgery! 27th of Januari!!
So on thursday me and Jesse is going to Stockholm to meet the doctors and go threw everything that is going to happen!

It will be exactly eight months on the day!!! since the first operation! Surely hope this one will go well and without any problems! Especially since i'm going all bymy self. Josh and Jaimee will stay in Linköping.
I'm nervous as f**k. And i just want it over with!!!

Party party

Today we celebrated Jesse. Nice calm day.
And since i still havent found the charger for the camera im only able to give you two photos from today!
I will put up more pics from today and christmas when i get them from my parents. =)


"today" is the day... 1 year ago... Jesse was born...


Some pics from today...

Birthday boy!!!

Mini birthday cake... just enough for all of us!!!

Very pleased to eat with his hands!... And he LOVED the cake... he had 3 pieces!!! =D

Eva, Isabelle and rasmus came down from Stockholm thursdag and stayed over the night!

WIIIHOOOOOO.... time to open up some presents!!!

Big thank you for all the gifts!!!!!!!

Jesse is very pleased!!!

Tomorrow is the "big" b-day party. So more pics will come later!... =)
And in tradition i've just completed mission impossible and made a kick ass cake for his party...

Big boy!

Jesse is such a big boy now! He still refuses to learn how to sit... but he is atleast crawling now!

Yammy yammy in my tummy

This morning Jesse decided that he is no longer going to have problems eating propper food! So this morning he ate a full oat meal  without problems and he loooooooved it!... Wihooo!!
Sure hope this weren't a one time thing!! No fun no more to see him struggle when the food gets up his nose!!

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